Tiger Tiger

Hopefully the tiger will keep us warm through the winter months.

 

Tiger tiger warm and bright

keep us warm though out the night

while we sleep tucked up in our beds

keep the demons from our heads

all winter days and all winter nights

keep away those awful frights

tiger tiger full of glee

while I sleep, don't eat me


composed after 3 1/2 hours of sleep, being awake all day and no coffee

 

After four unsuccessful attempts at endotracheal intubation, I decided to go for the surgical crichothyrotomy. See, I had tried twice with the standard ET/stylet combo only to 'tube the goose' as they say. My medic tried, the ground medic tried-no joy. Not even the bougie helped. We all ran into something between the epiglottis and the chords.
So I started asking my medic for the supplies: betadine, scalpel, kellys, 7.0 tube. I told the the ground medic to get the local doc on the horn and tell him what I'm about to do.
He asks, "Do you want an order?" I said, "I don't need an order, I just want him to know that someone is about to do surgery in his back yard."
I checked the land marks for the 10th time. Trachea, major vessels, hyoid, etc. I lean down and tell the unresponsive, dying guy with the hole in his head, "Just give me a minute will ya? Just one minute."
I hold my left index finger on his throat just below the hyoid, and with scalpel in my right hand, I begin to cut. Vertical from stem to stern, for about an inch and a half.
I cut deep enough to feel the tracheal rings. "Hold that light higher, will ya?" It was midnight in the yard next to where dude shot himself. "Give me a four x four, somebody. Is the suction handy? Bag him once real good." I see bubbles in the blood in the hole I just cut in his neck. Bullseye.
I stick the kellys in the hole, spread it horizontally. "Where's the tube? Thank you." Damn too small. Cut a little wider, making sure not to nick a vessel. This guy has enough blood flowing out of him already. Perfect. Tube's in. Bag him. How do his lungs sound? Excellent.
"Hey everybody. You guys kick ass. Let's get the hell out of here!"

true story

 

Here they are just in time for Christmas. You're favorite and mine.........
Bob and Doug McKenzie performing the 12 days of Christmas.

YouTube - 12 Days of Christmas Told by Bob and Doug Mackenzie

 

doooo et, doo et naaaaoooow

 

As crazy as this is gonna sound, Drewl, You can be flight nurse anytime, I would trust you to cut the right thing.

No offense but heres to never needing you:cheersaf:

 

We are not offended when our patients never come back.

 

tip your waitresses, and donate your organs.

 

I could turn this into a perverted funny, but i don't wanna get banned :ncb:

 

revenge of the bean burrito......

YouTube - Doughboy Diarrhea (To Much Fibre)

 

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

 

we're peggin' the meter, boys

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yeeeeehaaaaa

 

Those bastages at E Harmony have no sense of humor

 

At least it was an honest answer bear. I believe honestly is the best thing is a relationship. If your main purpose is to impregnate every woman on the face of the earth then at least ther are no surprises in the relationship. :thumb:

 

I don't get it> That's hilarious.

 

Bear now that was funny!!! It should probably go in the humor thread for eveyone to enjoy.

 

Even my wife laughed at that one.

 

I don't care who you are, that's funny right there.

 

Is it weird if I think about making female gingerbread cookies and eating them?