Humor Thread

It looks like they may be a bit smaller than when I was there in the 80's!!!!!

 

That is a trap, not a game.

 

Ain't that the truth

 

My first wife asked me one time, "Did you notice anything different today?" I said I saw that there was a new weed in my front lawn. Apparently that was not what she meant.

Fuck. Why didn't she just say "I cut my long hair off. What do you think?"

 

Looks at that pannier / Saddlebag

Sent from my Moto G (5S) Plus using Tapatalk

 

Hilarious!

 

So After BWeiss's post, I just had to go looking

 

What the fuck?!

 

Brappp!
https://i.imgur.com/wv2ut4W.gif

 

Awesome.

 

lmao! that could almost be a "is she a keeper?" kind of test...

 

Dave's not here, man.

Do you know where your back yard chickens are?

 

"A young man with his pants hanging half off his rear, two gold front
teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck, walked into the
local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing
welfare. I'd really rather have a job. I don't like taking advantage of the system, getting something for nothing."

The social worker behind the counter said "Your timing is excellent. We
just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur
and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in
his 2014 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes."

"Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be
expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is
rather awkward to say, but you will also have, as part of your job, the assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's
and has a rather strong sex drive."

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bull-shittin' me!"
The social worker said, "Yeah, well . . . You started it . . . . “