Humor Thread

:tea:

These are words on real Einstein's, I am Turing over a new Leaf and realize what a complete mad man I have been. I was watching how Hitler took over Germany. At least, I can see my madness is just that -Time for 8 beers or so and forget about what a screwed up I have become:drinkers::cheersaf:

 

Hey y'all,
Marc Marquez has a new bike for Assen!

 

Love the wheelie bar

 

I'd like to see how high he can get the ass of that bike in the air while hard braking.

 

Who might be on my mind during this video?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edse151Z6Ck

 

I can't fucking believe it. My Income Tax return form has been sent back because in the response to questions 4, "Do you have anyone dependent on you?", I replied: 2.1 millions illegal immigrants, 1.1 million crackheads, 4.4 million unemployable Jeremy Kyle scroungers, 900 thousand criminals in 85 prisons, plus 650 fucking idiots in Parliament and the whole European Commission." They said this was not an acceptable answer> So...who the fuck did I leave out?

 

Looks like the Illinois Censors missed this one!

 

that's Canada, the USA has a bigger problem, like bank of America ,mobil,Obama,us military, congress, JPMorgan, oil company's ect.

 

I can't believe my eyes ^

 

Except clarify the military. Should be the high ranks and bureaucrats who squander your money. Guys wearing the boots......:usa2::high5::bravo:

 

BB for president!

 

Some not so motorcycle typical stuff

 

What are the little dots around a woman's nipples?

Is Braille for "suck here"

 

I read on the internet that corners are dangerous...... best to get thru them as quick as you can.

 

An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency.
An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor.
"So, what is it?" grumbled the governor.
"Judge Garber has just died" said the attorney, "and I want to take his place."
The governor replied: "Well, it's OK with me if it's OK with the undertaker."

 

the Military is the biggest waster of money, 1,000,000,000,000 to build new bombs or WMD's-the only thing left will be cockroaches and Horney toads-the ones with spikes on their head-they Shoot blood out of their eyeballs too.-been around 65,000,000 years.:nono:

 

The cost of protecting "all" of your society is high. Even the simplest people reap the benefits and security of your Armed Services. Money can be saved for sure, but not on the backs of the heroes who risk it all so people can safely be critical of them.

 

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman were at a bar and had just started drinking their first round when a fly landed on each of their drinks.

The Englishman refused to drink his and ordered another.

The Irishman blew his away in a cloud of froth and carried on drinking.

But the Scotsman, well he carefully lifted the fly out by its wings and held it over his glass.

"Goo on!" He said. "Spit it oot ya wee bastard!"