Happy Memorial Day

Remembering those who gave their lives so that we can do what we love to do...

A few pics from my Washington D.C. ride this morning.

WWII Memorial


Korean War Memorial in the background.

 

Regardless of the politics of the conflict that our governmenst gets our men and women of the Armed Services involved in, we MUST remember the sacrifices they make, the pain and sorrow their families back home endure. And show them our support and love, welcoming them home when they arrive. Help them in dealing with the baggage they may have. Try to understand their hurt.

Be safe! You are loved by many.

 

You really want to make a veteran's day, DON'T thank them for their service. Really, this automatic response to learning someone is a veteran is super annoying. I don't think people realize how hollow this knee-jerk post 9/11 response sounds to former and current service members. It rings of the same quality and sincerity as "god bless you" after a sneeze, or "ride safe" to a motorcyclist leaving a gas station. Almost like you're trying to relieve yourself of some civilian guilt by not serving. Also, by saying thank you, you're implying their service was done as some sort of favor to you personally. With the exception of Vietnam, we all volunteered our time and were compensated with a paying job. I didn't sign up as a favor to you. Also, some vets may be dealing with PTSD and their service years may be a painful experience for them. Thanking them in a patronizing tone is not the way to go.

You want to thank a vet, donate time or $$$ to a non-profit that serves their interests.

 

Strange response, I am sure alot of people say it to make themselves feel good. My daughter served in the Army for 12 years as an interogrator, was sent to Germany a month before the wall came down. My oldest son is a veteran of a foreign war, did 2 tours to the Gulf on 2 different carriers. I thank them for their service, for they are better people than me. I couldn't face going to Vietnam at the time. I have been DC many times, and always made it point to visit the Vietnam War Memorial, undoubtly the finest Memorial in the country so simple, so elegant, and so emotional. Don't think improper to thank those 58,000+ men for their service in such a sensless war.

By all means donate money and/or time to whatever organization meets your criteria.

 

That's the problem, people say it to make THEMSELVES feel good.

Here's a few articles written by prior service members on the subject.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/02/22/sunday-review/please-dont-thank-me-for-my-service.html

http://thefederalist.com/2015/07/16/3-reasons-to-stop-thanking-me-for-my-military-service/

Edit: Note, I'm not talking about memorial day in particular. If you want to visit war memorials and pay a somber respect, I totally respect that. I'm more refering to the "thank you for service" that comes in everyday conversation and sees a dramatic increase around the time of any service related holiday.

There's a reason I will never thank another veteran for their service, I don't know what the circumstances were. For example, if it's an Iraq vet who lost an arm and numerous buddies overseas for a cause he now sees as pointless and is struggling with regret everyday. I just thanked him for that without knowing it. Kind of the way people say "merry xmas" around holiday time without considering the person they just said that to may be of another religion or none at all.

My service background is nowhere close to being dramatic, but I can't tell you how many times I've been thanked in everyday conversation when my employment background is brought up with a tone you might expect upon getting a receipt from a toll booth clerk. Almost like I'm causing a slight inconvenience by making them say an extra sentence. I certainly don't reply "you're welcome". It's annoying and gets very grating the more you hear it.

 

Pass the salt please. Thank you. Is that meaningless?

I am not trying to compare what your or our service people did to something as mundane as passing table salt. If someone reads it that way, I am sorry they feel that way. As well, I am sure that a response such as this thank you could bring up bad memories for someone suffering from the effects of hideous conflict. Maybe in a small number of them it will.

I will not compare my 25 1/2 years of service to the public to that of our service people either. But I did have to step up and do some things that other either cannot, or will not do. I am proud of that. I will always be proud of that. And the very few times someone has said to me, "Thank you for your service." causes a lump in my throat. The goddam asshole I fight with when drunk and having just killed someone in a car, will not thank me even when he is sober.

Just so you know. PTSD is a very complex issue. It is not well understood by many even the professionals. They cannot get into the heads of those of us who suffer. What triggers a response from those who do suffer PTSD is as different as those who suffer. The odour of meat gone bad now has a very different effect on me now than it did back in 1987. You need not know the details. It is not nice.

So, though I understand your opinion on this, and will support your right to have that opinion, I will still thank those who serve. Every chance I get. If someone who I thank makes me aware that it disturbs him personally, I will apologize for that and back away.

 

There are many others past and present that have chosen to put their lives on the line for the rest of us who haven't, they deserve our thanks too, spoken or otherwise. I was sitting in O'Hare waiting for my flight back to Seatle, I noticed a young enlisted man sitting a couple of rows away. When it came time to board the first class section, a well dressed man stood up and said to the GI, "I would be honored if you took my seat" and handed him his boarding pass. I think that qualifies an unselfish act of thanks.

 

The thing is, the majority of veterans aren't going to tell you off for it. It would make them look like a dick, most will be gracious and let it slide if it annoys them. I certainly don't correct people after they say it. I'd rather the conversation move on.

I am proud of my service, I don't regret it one bit but I didn't do it as a favor to anybody. I was compensated for my time, I don't need or want a dry "thank you" as if implying I "sacrificed" my years for your benefit. My point is, service members hear "thank you" so much it becomes a meaningless gesture. The american public especially has essentially been programmed to say thank you like some sort of robotic response. Along the same lines as an automatic "good morning", or "gesundheit". It rings incredibly hollow. I wish people would think about this beforehand.

That's why I said, if you REALLY want to thank a vet. Donate to a cause such as an agency that works towards veterans employment.

and again, this is not a dig at memorial day to be clear. Those who died in service to our country definitely deserve the recognition.

 

Understood. I still am thankful and will continue to honour those who serve. If it helps, you can rest assured, it does not just roll off the tip of my tongue. It is heartfelt.

 

Now I know, in the future I will ask "Would it offend you, if I said thank-you for your service"

 

especially don't thank living veterans on memorial day.

[video=youtube;I01B6PExmOU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I01B6PExmOU[/video]

 

I basically just thank my 2 kids on Veterans Day, never on Memorial Day.