Humor Thread

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. 'I'd like to be eight again,' she replied, still looking in the mirror.
On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then after breakfast he took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.
Five hours later, they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well, Dear, what was it like being eight again?
Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. 'I meant my dress size, you twit !!'
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong.

 

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Are there any words necessary?

 

that has to be a fake photo

 

The tires aren't smooshed enough

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Up.. there it is...up.. there it is....

 

But the sign in the background that says 'Myrtle Beach' indicates that it is in fact a real photo.


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I'd harpoon it.

 

No bike should deal with such a monstrosity as this mega human crushes it wheels. And that poor poor seat

 

Well at least the seat smells like fresh roses.

 

Or dead fish....oooooh

 

Eew. No. uke:

 

Yes we are well on track to be politically correct and bubble boy safe at all times.

 

Keeping in line with the Star Wars theme.....

NWS!

http://i.imgur.com/KFYz5e2.gif

http://i.imgur.com/rd5jhzV.gifv

 

^^^^LOL, that second one is pretty funny. Gotta steel that for a few other places!

 

lol, yeah I sent the second one to one of the IT guys who is obsessed with Star Wars, then sent the hot chick one to make up for it.

 

i know, right?

 

A very self-important college freshman was attending a recent football game.
He took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it
was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.

"You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one," the student
said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. "The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing, and....," as he paused to take another drink of beer.

The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young........so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shithead, what are you doing for the next generation?"

The applause was deafening. I just love senior citizens!!!