Give me your best arguments!

I see it like this... Everyone has passions in life. I have 3.

1. Aircraft
I met my wife after I joined the USAF so she couldn't say anything about it. I hated my job as a mechanic so when I had the chance to retrain to a flying career, I jumped on it. Of course my wife is not happy that I'm gone for average 180 days a year but she sees how happy I am compared to the first 9 years of my career so she's happy for me. Since I'm gone half the year, it makes the time we spend together that much better. We rarely fight and I think we have one of the best married relationships I've ever seen. I'm already planning my life after the USAF & I will most likely attempt to become a commercial pilot.

2. Motorcycles
She TRIED to stop me from buying a bike right after we got married. One was in the driveway less than 24 hours later. Why did I do this to her? I owned bikes before I met her and I'll probably own one until I die. She had no right to tell me that I can't own something so I pretty much told her to accept it or we could go get an annullment. Why? No one has the right to tell another person they can't do something that is perfectly acceptable. Sure, she was pissed off that I "defied" her but she got over it. I introduced her to riding, bought her a bike, taught her the basics & signed her up with a rider coach to get her own license. We've been happily married for more than 10 years. I could never imagine myself with another woman, that's how much she means to me but I WILL NOT let her whip me or tell me what I can or can't do.

3. Guns
I've been shooting since I was 8. I was raised around hunting and guns. I estimate my father has about 110-120 firearms & the collection is probably worth nearly $100K. Now, I'm a life member of the NRA & own several of my guns of my own. My wife never touched a gun until I taught her to shoot. Like me, she finds killing innocent paper targets theraputic & great fun. She's a life member of the NRA now. I only wish we lived somewhere where shooting is more acceptable. I can't wait to leave NJ.

In the end what does all this mean? You need have a conversation with your wife and sort this out. The world can always use another rider. You need to find out if it is simply against spending the money or she objects to riding in general. I won't tell you to give up your family for motorcycles but it's something I wouldn't give up.

KC-10 FE out...
lane:

 

I was just about to say all that, so i'll just say " I second the above"

I would also like to add,... I think that if you make a purchase while she is away she's gonna think you went behind her back and definately use that against you in the sure to come argument. Also, keep in mind,... your life sounds like its finally coming around for you. Perhaps right now participating in an "inherently" dangerous hobby just isnt the best thing.
.......sure would suck to have a major setback if ya know what i mean. (i speak from experience on this thought)

 

hmmm, sounds like a one way street of sorts (at least that's what I'd tell my wife!! j/k) ...but, you did make a promise to your wife. ...therefore, at the very least, you need to confirm (not ask) with her what you are wanting to do ---> And that you need her support in this decision.
Not knowing exactly what the situation was or why the promise was made, and after reading this thread, I'd say that the promise has been fulfilled.
I've been married 26 yrs and I can tell you that I certainly understand not wanting to begin your first riding season with her not being completely on board. Ask her to trust and honor your opinion reguarding this issue.
--One thing is for certain though, sir, ultimately you are responsible for your family. Take this into consideration when making your decision. You are the head of your household. Start acting like it! ....but do so in love. Bearing with one another in all things ie promises. Sounds like you'll be an owner soon enuff. Your wife is much more important than this bike ....man, that last sentance was a hard one!
gl

 

Thanks to all of you, really. I do appreciate your perspectives. Now it's time for me to approach this situation with "kid" gloves, and see what the verdict is going to be. Hopefully I'll be riding with you guys soon.

 

No problem

I've never had a bike, decided last month, and buying one this week - with the wife's ok. Wasn't ok at first though. My trick. Don't stop talking about the bike, every minute mention something about it. Eventually, my wife just said - "fine, go ahead and get the bike, just shut the hell up and quit talking about it all the time". My response - "Yes Dear, I love you", and off I went to the dealer.

 

LOL! Too funny!....But....at least you got your bike! Now its TCB2Country's turn. My northern finger's are crossed - & I hope to see you on the road soon!

 

LOL... Nice. I like that approach. Kinda what I'm working at. As for me, I'm getting closer with each passing day and it's looking like I'll have one by the end of April. Just completed the MSF course this past weekend which I found incredibly useful and would recommend it for anyone.

 

Hey nice. Was thinking of taking that course myself, even though I have my endorsement. As you said, incredibly useful. Great news on the bike, keep us up do date :biggrin:

 

Time for the kid to weigh in. Im a young engineer (24), just bought a 2006 Xterra and 6 months later a 2007 RWB VFR, if it is in your finances, then explain that to her rationally, but if it will stress your finances, wait until this record deal goes through.
I waited for 5 years earning two degrees to make the green to buy this bike, and though the RWB might only be around this year, there will always be some new hotness, put in the work, make the wife happy and the bike will come. Waiting sucks, but it will all be worth it in the saddle in the end.
Also, you married this woman so i figure she must mean a lot to you, dont blow that man. I have put a special woman second before and regret it to this day. Remember, a VFR doesnt cuddle quite as nicely or cook that well!

 

Thank heaven for small Mercies ...
I thought I was alone on this one . My wife and i do Not share the same interests , and since the Birth of my coolest dude in the world son , she REALLY pulled up the handbrake on all sports and activities .

When I went to the honda dealership in Oct 05 , i signed for a cbr 600 . She cried Wolf the whole time , I then gave up , walked out , walked in the following day and bought a quad ...

Then this darn VfR came by , and Im so glad I never bought the cbr , but the wife Nearly Blew her TOP .Everything I've ever done has been surrounded in conflict and disagreement . i finally went ahead and bought the thing despite the wife nagging with a long lip .
Im in agreement with some of the answers above - I wont Change who i was Before meeting my wife . She must accept me as I am for who i am , and I dont enjoy being cross-questioned and shot down for trying to enjoy the things that make me tick . I don't exactly want my Wife to give in to pressure , I want her to understand that I do what I do Not to Pee her off - I do it because after a mean days work , anyone would want something to unwind them , and , like the poster above on guns planes and bikes , I also have a few fun elements that I enjoy . some are spectator sports - like the quadding (I bought her one , doesnt ride it ) which I race competitively , and then there's this tourer . I didnt BUY a superbike as this would have meant an awkward and unconfortable ride for Her , Os I compromised and bought the Viffer .

I'm just releved to find that my household story is by no means Unique !! lol